I'm in love with my daughter's ex!
I'm dating a felon, can my childs father get custody?
The worst type of bad boy is a convict or an ex-con and sad to say, there are many women who fall for these men. While the rest of us were working to free David Milgaard, a Canadian man who had been wrongly convicted of murder and spent 23 years in prison, my friend, Louise Ellis, worked tirelessly to get a guilty man. 1 May Meeting someone who's been imprisoned for a serious crime is often another matter, however. And getting into a relationship with an ex-convict can seem like a big red flag. It isn't always, though. There are three major questions to ask before letting a guy go from one ball and chain to another kind entirely. In addition, he has at least one friend who is incarcerated and some of his family is a little questionable (based off of what he has told me my opinion). Since he . He has one child who is almost 18 who is graduating from high school this year. So there is nothing wrong from theoratical perspective of dating an ex- con.
Or, Message The Moderators for all other information. Post anything that is relevant to your current relationship that you want to discuss.
Make sure that it's a question, which will invite answers and offerings. This sub is about helping people in need - If you are not providing such help i. Please report comments that you feel are in violation of these guidelines to keep discussions constructive. At any time mods may remove or refer posts to other subs as we deem appropriate, and our decisions are final. Ex-wife is dating a felon self. My ex-wife and I we'll call her M divorced in August of last year after I found out she was having an affair with an old ex-boyfriend.
She came up pregnant at the time of the affair with our 4th child. I don't want to go too far into it because it's a really long story filled with bullshit but basically I stayed with her through the pregnancy to help out because I just thought it seemed like the right thing to do. We tried counseling but she was still talking to the ex and continued to lie about the relationship.
Looking back I'm still not sure what all exactly happened but I've processed it and moved on. Shortly after our last daughter was born we now have 4 all mine and her's I couldn't take it anymore and left.
It was a long road but we got divorced and she got custody of the kids and I got standard visitation. Despite the issues in our relationship I felt she was a good mother and I'm a firm believer that a daughter needs her mother.
It basically took a year for me to get divorced so I felt I was pretty well over the relationship. My ex-wife m became very dedicated to the church and started spending a ton of time there. Her and I still talked quite a bit because it's almost impossible not to when you have 4 children together. This past December M came to me and told me that she was interested in somebody at church, we'll call him V.
M said that she didn't know much about him but was getting to know him through the church. The church she goes to runs a My Daughter Is Dating An Ex Con program so I asked her if he was part of the program. M told me that he was but at one time but had graduated a while back. I told her to be careful and that I really didn't want the kids to be around him. She explained to me that they were just going to slowly get to know each other though church and the girls were only going to be around him Hetalia Dating Long Results church activities.
I wasn't really happy about this but there wasn't much I could do and I was satisfied click he wasn't going to be around the girls.
She won't work and she threatens you? Morgan had strangled her after she intimated that she wanted to leave him. Much more important, for a child of any gender, is to see their parents modeling healthy relationships.
At this point I did not question her judgment or think that she would lie because I felt she was trying really hard to change. We go through January and I would occasionally ask about it and she would maintain that they were just getting to know each other and they still were not hanging out outside of church.
Yet again, I am concerned but nothing I can really do. I did ask some additional questions and found out he was a felon but everything had happened a while back and he was a changed saved by God man.
Well everything fell apart at the beginning of February. Some of the things she was telling me just didn't seem to line up. Also the kids still had mentioned nothing about this guy.
So I started digging and came back with a few more unsettling details about his criminal record. So she brought the girls over and I told her that I wanted to talk to her about S. We stepped outside and away from the house so the kids couldn't here and started voicing my My Daughter Is Dating An Ex Con. M just smiled at me and seemed check this out almost glaze over as I told what little I knew about his past.
I asked her if she knew and she replied that she knew he had stole stuff and done a little meth. WTF a "little" meth?! Then she said if you want to meet him he's sitting in the van.
I looked over and there he was, just sitting there. I was able to maintain by composure but I walked over and opened the door introduced myself, shook his hand, and informed him that he was not allowed on my property, and wan not to step foot on my property again.
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He said, "Not a problem. I kept my composure but explained that I didn't want him around my kids period. M said that she would try to minimize the kid time around V and that they were still taking things slow. I found texts on my daughters phone 14 years old where M and V had been biblically calling me the Christian equivalent of a dumbass telling her that I didn't understand redemption and that I was just persecuting V because I didn't understand.
The rest article source the stuff either came from his public criminal record or was stuff that I had been told by M or other people throughout various conversations:. V has been out of jail less than six months on charges related to meth.
She probably will feel like she hates you for a while, but, hopefully in time she will grow up and realize that she brought that on herself. Instead they get this guy I know this sounds terrible, but I have a felony record from when I was about 23 years old.
V has a sustained criminal record over the last 15 years for theft, lying to the cops, more theft and meth. V is still on probation, doesn't have My Daughter Is Dating An Ex Con job nor a vehicle. V has been coming over to the house and hanging out with M and the kids, having supper, etc.
He has told my kids that he is in love with M and that God has told him to marry her. V is just waiting for God to tell M so they can move forward.
M has told me that she has realized in the last couple of weeks that she is deeply in love with him. Last week M and I talked and she told me that she had talked to her pastor and out of respect for me and the girls she didn't feel they were ready for somebody new she was going to limit V being around the kids. She said she was also going to limit her time with him as well because she didn't want to have sex before marriage but something had happened when he stayed over the previous week.
Less than 24 hours after we had that conversation he was over at the house with the kids. Then yesterday they spent the day together and ran all over click the following article and I'm not certain but I believe he spent the night.
I have tried every possible way to explain to her that she is taking a big risk, not only with herself but with the kids. With all the lies Click has told me I've decided to focus solely on the kids.
The question is what can I do? He had been out of jail less than 4 months and is still in the Christian bubble. I'm afraid of what might happen to my kids if he relapses. I am in the process of lining up an attorney, I also just wanted to get some perspective.
I have talked to friends and family about going for custody and they think I should, but I also wanted to try to get an honest opinion from some people that have zero loyalty to me. Of course there are two sides to every story but I have attempted to present facts and leave my two cents out of it.
My personal belief is that my ex is still the selfish and hasn't changed and the felon is just using her. Also all of their grades are on a steady decline. I don't really care anymore that she is dating this guy, I just click the following article want my kids to be part of this.
26-Year-Old Homeless Alcoholic Would Rather Be With Ex-Con Fiancé Than Her Mother
I've left out a lot of the stuff that's gone on to avoid getting to detailed, but based off the basic response here I feel that I'm heading the right direction.
I have been documenting the issues, set appointment with a lawyer, and working towards getting my house ready. TLDR; Despite many requests, that she agreed to, to keep him the felon away from the kids she still finds an excuse to have a felon around my kids.
Smart Women, Dangerous Choices: Part One
Call your lawyer first thing in the morning. If you didn't have a lawyer the first time, get one now. A daughter does not need a mother using religion to manipulate her kids.
And this man is a criminal who you don't know at all, and it sounds like she barely knows. She is an unfit parent. I can't believe she would allow a man like that around her children. Some of the delay is she has been telling me that out of respect for me and the kids he won't be around. Then she breaks it. Also, manually hunting down his criminal record has been a pain. I don't really think he's ever had a decent job so he's not exactly on the radar.
I basically only found out all this stuff last week. Apparently everybody thought that since her I talked that I knew she was dating somebody. I'm not sure what methods you used for "manually hunting down his criminal record", but just in case you haven't tried this already You might find some records that you haven't seen yet. That's pretty much the route I've taken.
Some of the other places that are not online you pretty much just have to call them. In one case I will have to subpoena the information: You seem to be delaying painful decisions under the guise of nobility.
I hope you find the strength to push and make the right link to protect your kids soon. I don't see anything about you talking to a lawyer. He's click here drug-convicted felon on meth chargeswhy aren't you revisiting the custody issue ASAP?
This is one of the few times on this sub-reddit where a parent has actually brought up something that may count as a material change of circumstance instead of the constant " Whine I'm not getting my way! You as a divorced parent have no say in who she dates or doesn't date and the same goes for her about you. Otherwise, spiteful people would just be in court all the time bringing it up because the other person had the nerve to move on.
That being said, you do have a say about if your children are being exposed to something that is detrimental to their well-being. The fact that he has a criminal record, even if it's recent, may not be enough.